Sunday 8 August 2010

The Trojan War

I am the destroyer of Trojans.

I sliced and cut my digital sword into their hide and speared Achilles in the heel.

Beside me, Pretty Paris (played by Microsoft Security Essentials)folded all too easily (too busy staring at Helen, I suppose), but Hector (Malwarebytes) put up a nobile fight and helped me clear my computer of invading Greeks (played by bytes).

I hope Agamemnon (excuse me while I roll his name off my tongue maybe a dozen hundred times) doesn't return. Or if he does, he comes in the form of his namesake butterfly. I wouldn't want to crush its rebellion, but I could if I needed to.

*This bonkers post was brought to you by a seven hour battle with a trojan virus on my precious laptop. I emerged the victor. For now.

17 comments:

Steven Pirie said...

There's something sneaky going around that pops up as a warning from McAffee that I've been infected and I should click the box to remove.

Except clicking the box actually downloads the trojan.

There's something extra nefarious about mimicking the security software itself to break through the defences (and clever, I suppose I have to concede).

Rebecca Nazar said...

Was it as messy as the movie 300? ; )

Cate Gardner said...

Mine claimed to be an antivirus program too. Only it wasn't my antivirus program so I knew right away something was screwing with me. Sods.

Cate Gardner said...

Rebecca - messier :D

Simon said...

I really would like to get my habnds on the people who make viruses. Glad you and your laptop came through to quirk another day. And now, I suspect, you'll be wanting cake.

Cate Gardner said...

Me too, Simon (and yes I do) :D

Anthony Rapino said...

Woo! Congrats on the win. I always have a strange sense if accomplishment when I run a virus or spyware scan and get to banish them to the quarantine zone.

Bobbie Metevier said...

I have a Java update that keeps popping up. You can choose to be reminded in one day, seven days or forteen days. I have chosen seven days multiple times and it still pops up every single day! I wonder if this is like that . . .

Cate Gardner said...

Thanks, Anthony :D

I don't thinks so, Bobbie. I get the same Java update and have ignored it for forever. Oops! No this wouldn't let me open the internet or any of my antivirus programs and kept giving fake messages. I had to go into safe mode to fix it. Thank goodness for the second computer.

Katey said...

It is really, really hard to stop saying "Agamemnon" isn't it?

But yay for victory!

K M Kelly said...

Yay! Take that nasty virus!!

Andrea Allison said...

Congrats on the victory!

Aaron Polson said...

Every victory is temporary. Keep fighting the good fight.

(and congrats on making through this round, alive)

Jamie Eyberg said...

I would like to string up virus programmers by their genitalia and flog them in public for what they put upon the public. But that is just me. I am glad you are a victor this time. I hope you will be as successful next time.

Barry Napier said...

People that have nothing better to do that drop Trojans and other viruses around the internet to nfect others' computers should be castrated with fishing knives in front of their children.

Fox Lee said...

Wait...so you set fire to a bunch of condoms?

Unknown said...

Hi..
Congrats on the Victory..

James…
Karachi Architecture