The first is the 'You are My Sunshine' award - blows kisses at Jamie Eyberg. The purpose of this award is to thank the people who regularly visit your blog for their support.
I'm passing this award onto:
Katey Taylor and Aaron Polson because they paid me squillions of monopoly money and begged me to choose them, which leads me onto my next award.
Alan Davidson is under the impression that I'm an honest scrap. I feel the need to do the mwahahaha thing... Honesty is boring, here are ten made up things about Cate... Erm, me...
1. Cate talks about herself in the third person all the time. For instance, here is a line she used at the local sweet emporium this very afternoon: 'Dear Mr. Shopkeeper, Cate would like a chocolate bar the length of her bath tub and a kettle to boil some water.'
2. Cate toddles along to work in ten-inch sparkly heels and hot pants, even in the snow. Tights are for wimps.
3. Cate is not actually Cate, that is, her name is a pseudonym. Her real name is Clarissa Swellington-Head - think about it, she is British.
4. Mid-afternoon, Cate drinks tea with her pinky raised, eats cucumber sandwiches and has a man servant kiss her toes.
5. Cate used to live on a canal barge. Unfortunately, she annoyed the ducks so much by warbling Britney Spears songs, that they pecked a hole in the side of it and left her to drown. To this day, her eyelashes are still wet.
6. Whenever you hear thunder, Cate just sneezed. Whenever you see lightning, Cate switched off her computer screen.
7. Cate was the first person to toddle on the moon. NASA erased all images of her crawling down the steps ahead of Neil Armstrong.
8. The piece of lunar rock perched above her computer monitor smells suspiciously like cheese.
9. Cate hosts zombie cage fights on the first Saturday of every month. She wears the hot pants, heels and is known to nibble on dead men's ears.
10. The Colin Firth you see on screen is not 'the real Colin Firth'. Cate stole him in the mid 1990s and hid him in her basement. She insists he call her Elizabeth. She hopes Mr Polson doesn't carve any doors to let him out.
I must now pass this award on to two of the most