Saturday 5 March 2011

Let Her Eat Cake

I read a lot of advice on the internet. And I'm sure you do to.

Some of it wise. Some of it not. Some of it dictating how blogs, tweets, facebook etc etc etc should be. We're all different. We all want different things. Sometimes I agree with the advice with a 'heck yeah, that annoys the hell out of me,' and sometimes I'm all, 'what do you mean that's wrong? I love it when people do that.'

You know what, be who you want to be.

Oh no, does that mean I just gave advice?

Here's some more...

Rubbing coconut hand cream all over your hands and then running said hands through your hair is a silly thing to do.

You might be embarrassed opening the door with your hair doing a jedward* (if you don't know who they are DO NOT google) and with your mascara crying 'she should have washed me off before bed', but think about how the poor startled postman felt. He had to drive responsibly after he left your house when all he wanted to do was get a stiff drink. (I have pocket watch necklaces--squee)
 
Buying pineapple upside down pudding when you're on a diet is not okay just because a) it's your brother's birthday and your mum always bought you a cake on his birthday when you were small (you're no longer small) or b) you'd never seen it before (you need to get out more--but not to cake shops).


*Actually, I lied, my hair was more Edward Scissorhands.

12 comments:

Anthony Rapino said...

I want Edward Scissorhands hair. But I have no coconut cream :-(

So now the rest of my day will be spent trying to *not* google that word.

Cate Gardner said...

Edward Scissorhands hair is achievable in so many ways--I bet you have an appropriate product. Do not google. And certainly don't you tube.

Michael Stone said...

Let's see, don't rub coconut hand cream into my hair and wash my mascara off at bedtime. Thanks, Cate. What would I do without you. :D

And pineapple upsisde-down pudding ftw! I advise you to have plenty of custard with it.

Cate Gardner said...

Without me you'd look like Edward Scissorhands. :P And I have a packet of Birds Custard waiting for me. I like my custard runny.

Lee Thompson/Thomas Morgan/James Logan/Julian Vaughn said...

Good advice on not taking all advice to heart, Cate. Who is Edward Scissor Hands?

Katey said...

I'm really sad that I actually DO know who jedward are. That damn Q Magazine subscription did as much damage as it did good, last year...

I'll bet the postman thought it was lovely. You were all goth and awesome! :D

Cate Gardner said...

My alter ego, Lee ;)

Jedward were in Q. I thought Q was supposed to be a cool magazine, Katey.

Simon said...

I almost successfully avoided knowing anything about Jedward, but had dinner with a lady who wanted to watch the X-Factor. I still wake up screaming.

I'm trying to picture the poor postman's expression...

Diana said...

I had to google "jedward" just to see what would horrify horror writers. :)

They're on wikipedia, too. :)

Ice Ice Baby! mwhahahaha

Cate Gardner said...

The postman should know not to knock at doors pre eight o'clock on a Saturday. He's obviously a masochist, Simon

Ha, Diana.

K.C. Shaw said...

Anything with pineapple in it is obviously diet food and you should eat two helpings. It's good for you!

Cate Gardner said...

It also had a cherry, which I suppose makes it extra healthy ;)